Thanks for the mammaries

By Lana

Hooray! As I enter week four of motherhood, my breasts have now become useful and fully functioning appliances in my nursing efforts. They certainly weren't that way at first. In those first few days after delivery, they resisted my child's attempts to use them as feeding organs, becoming painful, lumpy and, it must be said, exceedingly unattractive -- but huge, too!

They took on a life of their own, a little like the machines in the "Terminator" movies, and there was little I could do to control them. They hurt like hell, but my boy was hungry, so all I could do was to keep on feeding him and wincing as he and my boobs struggled to find a happy balance with each other.

As the days passed, they, and my son, settled down and I'm happy to say that the breast revolution has now been quelled. And not a moment too soon. At about day 5, I was seriously considering a mastectomy, anything to rid my body of these tender, milk-shooting appendages.

Other mothers kept telling me that one day I would enjoy the act of nursing, and I didn't believe them at first. But now I see that they were right -- looking down at my little boy's face as he vigorously searches for and grasps my breast never fails to melt my heart. His happy cooing noises and bright, alert eyes as he suckles are expressions of pure bliss.

Since the early days of my pregnancy I've been fascinated by the changes in my breasts, and never more so than now that they have become the key to my baby's survival. I love how simple it all is: when he's looking fretful, I just whip out a breast and all is well again.

If only other human relationships could be mastered so easily.

Boobs for world peace? Maybe we ought to give it a try.

Comments

[Elizabeth S.]

Boobs for world peace! I love it... and I think you'd quite a few male recruits for that movement.

[Susan]

Wow, your post gave me flashbacks of how hard the breastfeeding process was to master. I think it's great that a generation of women like us will be able to guide our daughters through this process when they have babies of their own. As it was, my mom and mom-in-law couldn't help me a bit in my early unsuccessful nursing attempts. Thank heaven for the wonderful pediatric nurse at my baby's practice; she took her lunch break to help me get the hang of it.

Once she latched on, my first baby took her time weaning. She was almost 3. Her sister nursed until she was 2, and I am now nursing my third baby, a 4-month-old. The ironic thing is, I haven't the faintest idea how to heat up a bottle. Take that, formula companies!

[Michelle Willingham]

That's wonderful that you've established that bond. I nursed my son for seven months and had to stop early. I promised myself that I would only stop with my daughter when I felt it was time. These past two weeks (she's nine months old now), I started weaning her because I wanted to have more time with her in the evenings for stories, play time, etc. and formula gave me that freedom. But then she got a double ear infection and there was only one way to comfort her--you got it. Nursing. I don't regret it one bit. If it calms her and makes her feel loved, great. That's what nursing is all about--forcing a new mom to stop, put her feet up, and snuggle with her child. It's about love.

[Charlene]

LOVED this post. You really captured the emotions/experiences of a newbie breastfeeder! It reminded me so much of when those first few weeks with my son. Not a day went by that I almost quit. Then it was, just let me get through one day, one week, one month. And I'll never forget the day he was nursing, about 3 months old, and he stopped, looked up at me and smiled. Then continued on his merry nursing. I think I cried on him I melted so much.

[Nicola]

Congratulations! You made it past the scary, painful, "I'll never be able to do this" stage. My son was 4 days old when I went waddling (stitches, lots of stitches) into the local breast feeding support group full of questions and anxiety. It took a few weeks to get things working right (which makes sense -- why do we new moms expect that our bodies need no time to adjust?), and he's been a happy little nursling ever since.

Kellan is 11 months old now and still nurses heartily many times each day. And for comfort, there's nothing like it. Its *so much* easier and faster now. He knows what he's doing and I'm just along for the ride. And talk about funny looking breasts -- because he always preferred the right side, my left one eventually gave out completely. I am lopsided, very. Its an amusing process. Congratulations on joining the club.

[Michelle]

I had troubles at first but made it through to 18 months, which was about 8 weeks into my second pregnancy. I'm so glad I didn't give in. I tried formula, too, and found it just so much easier, day and night, to whip out that booby. No boiling, no bottles, no re-heating and waiting. Good for you for staying with it. I know some moms can't or won't do it for whatever reason and I'm not one to judge. But I'm always glad to hear about a new mom who has given it a try and seen it through.

Re: lactation consultants - I never paid a dime to see one. Had a couple at the hospital, one through a state grant program for new moms, and a couple at a weekly meeting at a nursing bra store. The resources are out there.

[Helene]

OH, so True. The first few weeks are the worse, but once you find you rhythm its magical. :)

[Cathy]

Great post! With my son, I didn't make it to the good stuff, I quit after just six days. I just never thought it could be good, I thought all the moms who said they enjoyed nursing must be into S&M as well! My daughter is now four months old and I love nursing. The first month was the hardest. I love when she wraps both her arms around my breast and squeezes, as if giving her milk a little love.

[Amy]

I stopped nursing after less than a month. I was chastised from everyone from family members to the nursing staff at my hospital. But you know what? Isabelle is very well adapted and happy and she loves me just as much as other babies love their moms. Sometimes nursing just doesn't work :) You are doing what you can when you can!! Congrats!

[Michelle Cantrell]

The first 6 weeks of mom-hood, I think are by far the hardest (of course, my older daughter is only three, so I may change my mind when turns 13). The lack of sleep alone is enough to break any spirit. Add breastfeeding to the equation, and you're in for one tough ride.

I think our disconnected society makes it even harder. It used to be that when you had a baby, you moms, aunts, grandmothers, etc. surrounding you, helping you with the baby, giving you advice (whether wanted or not) and much needed guidance. But these days, we're expected to do it all on our own. Yes, we do have lactation consultants (for a hefty fee), but I think most only turn to them after there is a problem. And then of course, there are the people out there who have forgotten what our boobs are REALLY for, and think it obscene to feed our children in public (or worse, not breastfeed at all) and expect us to go to a dirty public bathroom to do it.

But if you can make it past those first few challenging weeks, you will find so many wonderful joys of breastfeeding. I breastfed my first daughter until she was one year old, and I am now nursing my 10 month old with the same intentions. I love that time we have together, and although sometimes it is a hindrance (more so before she was on solids than now) since you could never be far from home (or you had to milk yourself -- MOO -- with a breast pump), it is still an amazing part of motherhood. I just love it when she stops nursing to turn her head and give me a big smile.

However long you choose to nurse your son, know that you are doing a wonderful thing for both him and yourself.

[Todd Vodka]

I very much enjoyed your post, and was grateful to have found it through the NY Times Article.