My dirty little secret

By Donna

We just finished a month-long period when we were having houseguests just about every weekend. This means that we can now go back to living our lives as we usually do -– surrounded by clutter and dust.

I don’t think of myself as a slob, and I don’t like living in slovenly surroundings. But at the end of a long day that includes working, volunteering at school, driving my daughter to her activities, and seeing to it that my family is fed, I’m ready to sit down and relax for a while.

Yes, I know that there are others living in the house who could be pulling their weight in this department. However, they are all just as busy as I am, if not more so. My husband works long hours and often brings it home on the weekend; when he does have free time I am happy to let him handle projects like fixing the sprinkler system which always seems to be breaking, or finishing the paint job that he started last year. My 9-year-old’s after-school schedule is mind-boggling. She only has a few hours each week when she is able to “do nothing,” and that’s what I’d rather she do.

So the housework is up to me, which is a dirty shame (in more ways than one).

Mind you, I take care of all the really important stuff: There’s always food on the table (even if I didn’t actually prepare it myself) and the dishes are clean (even if I do occasionally resort to using paper and plastic when I’m not in the mood to wash). We always have clean clothes, even if they’ve been sitting in a pile in the guest room for a couple of days until I find the time to fold them and put them away.

But the time between the bigger jobs is often a lot longer. It’s just that when you look at my “to do” list, dusting the house isn’t anywhere near the top. Is it crazy to dislike cleaning the bathroom? Or to feel discouraged when five minutes after mopping the floor, someone has tracked dirt all over it again? Why would anyone willingly continue to engage in an activity that has “futility” written all over it?

Thank goodness I have lots of friends who seem to think it’s OK to drop by once in a while, which forces me to drag out the vacuum and kick some dust-bunny butt. I may allow my family to live in a mess, but I wouldn’t dream of letting my friends see it! 

Donna is a San Fernando Valley wife and mother.

Comments

[rosemary grace]

This is one of the reasons I'm hoping I will be able to be a stay at home mother for a while when I have kids: I barely get the laundry put away and the bathroom cleaned NOW, with only a full time job and a husband.

My excuse is that my 45 min each way commute is eating my housework time.

[ella]

I hate cleaning and I will only clean if friends are coming over. Sometimes I have to invite friends over just to make myself clean up once in a while!

[Kara]

I feel the same way. I keep the house generally neat, and try to vacuum thoroughly every week (we have 2 black dogs), but I try not to let it invade on my "relaxing" time. You know, when I'm grocery shopping or doing laundry :)

Seriously, though, a friend once told me one of her mother's sayings was "the sink is full of dishes, there's a pile of laundry to be done . . . let's play!" I think that's a great attitude to have sometimes! But for me there's a certain point where my brain starts to become as cluttered as the house. That's no good.

[Christina]

I like that sign, Robin. I have one that says "Dull people live in immaculate houses." House of 5, two of whom work full time, 3 of who sit around and pick their noses in their spare time (which really, isn't much, actually)...job list, still can't get it all done. We're having a dinner party this weekend and have no time to clean.

Laundry folded and put away? HA HA HA HA HA. Washed and dried is a definite, but folded and put away? It usually comes out of the basket to wear and then back into another basket to wash....LOLOLOLOl. Someday Alice will leave the Bradys and move in with me and then my house will be perfect all the time.

Hey, does anyone have Mary Poppins' number?

[Maria]

I'm with you! W/child #3 we had to give up the cleaning lady and it shows. We're having a birthday party this weekend and I'm most stressed about getting the laundry put away and the downstairs bathroom cleaned - if people see how dirty my house is, they'll never come back - eeek!

[LPF]

I am right there with you! We moved into our house three months ago and we're still unpacking. Dusting and bathroom cleaning rarely rises to the top of my To Do list. I'm trying to do FLYlady (http://www.flylady.net) just so I don't feel so stressed when we have guests, but I know I will never be a neatnik!

[Robin P]

I feel the same way.By the time Rich and I get home each evening,we're half dead. He does all the laundry once or twice a week. We both kind of clean but it always seems to look like we are moving since there is so much stuff on it's way to another room. Clutter...ya gotta love it.

I once bought my sister a wonderful sign for her room when she was a teenager.It said,"You can TOUCH my dust but please do not write your name in it!" I think that says it all.

[amy h]

Ha ha ha ha ha!!! My sentiments EXACTLY! Let my family live in filth but let my friends believe that we live like we have a live-in housekeeper! You made me laugh because I related so much!
Thanks!