Does it ever seem like it's all just made up?
On Monday, I will turn 34. Yes, 34. I have to habitually subtract my birth year from the current year to confirm. (Wait, is it 2003 or 2004? Oh, that's right it's 2006). I am pregnant with child number two. Am I really a mom to even one? Am I not still in high school stressing over some impossible quandary like ....? Umm, what did I even stress about then? Now I am going to be a mother to two children. And we have just found out that number two will be a son to balance out our four-and-a-half-year-old daughter. OK, I know I baked the birthday cakes, but when did she become an almost-kindergartener?
My husband, Cole, and I have officially been married ten years next month. But we have now known each other for twenty-four years. Huh? We have a house and two cars and bags of fertilizer in the garage and an understanding of when it is helpful to create a roux. We just bought a king size bed because we were starting to wake up sore and figured we might as well go king size for the middle of the night slumber parties with two kids. The two of us who used to sleep together in a single bed in our college dorms? The king size is more like sleeping alone if the truth is to be told, but neither of us feels even remotely bad about that.
I suddenly have seven nieces and nephews -- and the weirdest part is that my baby brother (who I remember coming home from the hospital and toddling around and marching off to kindergarten) is now a father himself. Isn't he still standing in front of the family television blocking my view of some Cassidine building a weather machine on General Hospital? And the first granddaughter of our family, Cassidy, is going to be ten years old. Her mommy stood by my side at the altar on the day we got married so pregnant we thought she was going to pop. And now she is on the verge of thinking that her aunt is weird and not cool and "can I please just go hang out in my bedroom?"
Even the damn cat is 15 years old. Cole and I got her as a kitten our sophomore year in college. If she were a child, we'd be talking about learners permits and driving lessons. As it is, she's still just a nasty cat with very little tolerance for human beings. But 15 years old?
I remember at my mom's 50th birthday party, I had just turned 25 and my nephew Dillon was a newborn. At the time, I said "just imagine, in the same time it took me to get from birth to 25, Dillon will be 25 himself and I will be the 50 year old (and yes Mom, you will be 75)." But I was completely wrong. The time it takes for you to grow from zero to 25 might as well be thousands of years compared to the speed with which you progress through adulthood.
I really don't mind the being old part. You are truly blessed with each year. But what I wouldn't give for one of those eternal summers of an eight-year-old.
Kristin is married to her high school sweetheart and the mother of one daughter, Madeline.