Making The List

By Jo

I’ve recently admitted to myself that I am one of those compulsive list making people. This is not to be confused with the compulsive list making and completing people. They can actually finish their lists and have something to show off to all their friends. People like me however make the lists but rarely complete them.

I know what you’re thinking, why make lists at all then? Well because if I don’t, you will most likely see my children on a talk show in twenty years being asked “How has your mother forgetting to pick you up from activities ruined your life?” Lists are necessary for the times my memory decides to take the day off.

Over the years though I have learned a few things about list making that have helped me immensely. Here are just a few of them:

• Keep your lists short and simple. The longer the list the less likely you will be to finish it.
• If you look at your list in the morning and instantly feel exhausted, it’s too long.
• Never compare your list to someone else’s. It seems no matter how well we’ve done we always feel like someone else has done better.
• Worry less about what you didn’t get done and more about what you did. You should feel a sense of pride for your accomplishments not guilt.

Has learning these things guaranteed I will complete my lists? Not entirely. Has it helped me finish more of them? Absolutely and better yet, I no longer feel stressed about the things I don’t cross off.

I’m also happy to report that in fifteen years I’ve never forgotten to pick the kids up from something. Well, maybe just the one time but that was before I started making lists. That one doesn’t really count, does it?

What things do you make lists for? Feel free to share your stories and tips on getting the most out of list making.

Jo is the thirty-something homeschooling mother of three miracles (15, 11, and 3) as well as a wife, poet, freelance writer, and MEN2a advocate living with cancer.

Comments

[lauren]

Oh, my God, I'm just reading these very funny confessions of fellow list-makers. May I suggest a book out this month (and an October BookSense pick)? "Things to Bring, S#!t to Do...and other inventories of anxiety: my life in lists," by Karen Rizzo. Very funny and pertinent.

[Kate]

I am such a list person. And I get so much satisfaction from scratching out each thing I've accomplished. No little check mark next to each. A big bold line right through it!

[Maria P]

I make lists too. I have this little brown notebook I bought at Whole Foods that says Lists, Notes, Plans on the outside. I write immediate to do's on my day planner though.

[jane]

I really identify with this you know , I am a list maker I have a not book i sometimes put them in so i can easily cross items off... how many items are crossed off. not many at all

[Robin R]

I'm a "to-do today" list writer. But I usually get a late start on the list, because I drink my coffee here at the keyboard. Then the kids stop my progress every 20 minutes or so. Then I run out of steam by about 3 o'clock, and start the countdown to dinner time.

But I have a really cool desk clendar with all my lists on it. At least that way I always know what day it is. :)

[Robin P]

This just cracked me up,Jo!

The only list I make is a food shopping list and even that back fires on me. Lillianna will ask,"Is that on the list,Mom?" My answer is always the same,"Uhm...well....YES! Yes it is." When she asks to see the list I tell her she can push the cart if she wants to. That always distracts her!

I never have all the things on the list which is why my shopping bill is always so darn high. I am an impulse buyer.
Now you know my secret.

Great post!

[Charli]

Oh, fine then- I will come out of the closet too! I have actual notebooks just for lists. I have lists saved in Word. I am addicted to bookmarks, favorites, technorati, del.icio.us, and others because they are LISTS! I heart lists! I think this way I feel I have a direction that I am heading in, you know?!

[Jennifer]

I think we should start a club everyone who makes a list and doesn't finish it, come out of the closet!

I make lists, and I even sometimes (like during a holiday season with the multi-tasking going on) make a master list of all my lists. I try to keep them in one place, in a nice notebook, but they end up growing on the back of letters, junk mail, and so on.

There's something very freeing about making a list. It's like I have this worry stone that my mind is rubbing obsessively over and over again: say, "Order the vacation tickets." I feel it going round and round in my head and I can't sleep, afraid I'll forget. So I get up, "purge" my busy brain onto a piece of paper, and sleep like a baby. If I'm working on my blog and visions of cat food start dancing in my head, same thing. And the funniest part? Once I write it down, I'll often not need to look at the list; I'll just remember.

But the best lists for me are the theme lists. One list for "what to bring on vacation", one for groceries, one for "things to get done this week during baby's naptime" (though that list can get preempted by a mommy nap!) and so on.

And here's the sickest part - I like saving some of my lists. They are pratically my diary. I have my organizational book from my pregnancy and it's practically list after list, but those notes show me what I was worrying about, what I was obsessing over, and what I naively thought I had control over! It's a slice-of-life sort of thing, I guess.

Or it's just junk, and I'm a packrat.

Jennifer

[Jo]

Oh how funny! I figured most of the comments would be from people telling me tips on listmaking and instead it's people just like me posting. I love it and thank you all so much.

Knowing there are others who approach lists the same way I do gives me ammo next time the hubby starts complaining. hehe.

Again, thank you all for commenting. I always love "hearing" how others can relate.

[Meg L.]

LOL - I make lists and then I never look at them again. I'm not sure that it does me much good that way, but I always hope that it has collected my thoughts before I run out the door. Who knows?

[Julie]

I love making my weekly menu list. Some weeks I even use it for a day or two :)

Oh well.. how are you supposed to know on Sunday morning what you're going to be in the mood for on Thursday night?

I do better with grocery lists at least.

Cheers!

Julie

[alittlelighter]

I love lists! I am a very visual person and so ADD (self-diagnosed). I need my lists to feel that sense of accomplishment ... Silly I know, but oh so true. I make lists for what I need to do the next day whether I look at it the next day or not...it helps me get to sleep at night. Sometimes I make lists of "big" things that need to be done and then I prioritize. I would be running around aimlessly (more-so than usual) without my lists.

[Frankie Straight]

Wow, we are alike! I do the list thing too. I bet there are 20 lists in my purse. I have homeschool lists, cleaning lists, to-do lists, birthday lists -- it's endless. My husband makes fun of my lists.

I used to keep my lists in a steno notebook and copy what I didn't complete the previous day to the current -- gave that up because it was depressing!

Sometimes I make very detailed lists, with stupid step-by-step items, because then I get to cross out a whole bunch of things. All those lines make me feel better.

How do you tell a single man from a married man at the grocery store? The married man carries a list.

[Janet]

Ugh. I am a list making machine. I too get nothing done on them. I write short ones purposely so they don't look overwhelming..However, that leaves me with 4-5 short lists that I continue to lose and hafta rewrite...I make lists for: Grocery shopping, birthday cards and gifts to buy, who to call, appointments to make and go to, what we need for the house, what my daughter needs, what I need, what my husband needs, what my dog needs...Looka: I just made a friggin' list here in your comment area for the love of god. Someone smack me.