Drama queen in training

By Anne-Marie

Lucie has expressed her emotions loudly and with gusto almost since birth. As an infant, she had colic. She also cried every time her father picked her up, and only settled down when given back to me. Luckily for us, she outgrew both behaviors.

Around the time she started crawling and sitting up, if she didn't get her way, she'd throw herself on the ground, roll over on her back, then scream and cry. I'd stand over her, smile and ask, "Are you done yet?" She'd smile back, knowing I was in on the joke. Still, she got her message across.

The breath-holding spells were the worst. The episodes, about a half-dozen in all, usually occurred when she was very tired and had hurt herself.

The scariest one was when Lucie and her brother Nathan where playing downstairs while I worked upstairs. I heard Lucie cry then Nathan saying, "Lucie, breathe now, breathe!" She had fallen and bumped her head on the tile hearth in front of the fireplace.

I rushed downstairs, and found Lucie with her head in Nathan's lap. I picked her up, but she was limp and wasn't breathing. I placed her on the floor, rocked her chest with my hand, and said her name loudly. She started to breathe, cried weakly, and then went limp again.

I was seconds away from calling 911. After rubbing her chest vigorously, she seemed to wake up but was blue around her lips. I made sure she was breathing and her heart was beating. After trying to rouse her a few more times, I realized she was in a deep sleep. I took her upstairs, put her in her crib and checked on her every so often until she woke up.

When things settled down, I did a Google search and found that pallid (turning pale) breath-holding spells are not uncommon. According to current pediatric research, four to five percent of children have them. I also talked to one of her pediatricians, who said to make sure she's safe during the spells but not to make a big deal out of them. Otherwise, they could become a learned attention-getting behavior. She's only had one major and a few minor spells since then.

I just wonder: why don't they make drama queen T-shirts in toddler sizes?

Comments

[Kim Nace]

I have an eight year old drama queen. I kept hoping that she would grow out of it. Before she reached two she hit the "terrible twos." She could just tantrum over anything. She has never grown out of them!!!!! She now must be the center of attention ALL the time. She is unaware of her self centeredness, and her sister, who is older has learned to cater to her so that life is simpler. As a mother I have tried so many things with her, but it is just exhausting. She is worse in the ams when she is tired but sometimes I just don't know how I am going to make it through the weekends. Anyone have advice on this? I have tried positive praise, incentive plans, firm redirection, time outs, loss of privledges.....I work with kids with behavior problems so this should be easy for me...but my darling girl wears me down. She is my greatest challenge. The thing is she is also the sweetest, most loving little girl in the world. I try to encourage that child to hang out more...but as soon as something does not go her way, she does any and everything to control the situation so that everything is about her. She also does this when she is happy, always singing loud, telling poeople to watch her, insisting that she has something funny to say or show you. Maybe she is just soooo alive...and feels every emotion soooo strongly...but wemere mortals can not keep up with the intensity. HELP!

[laura]

i hAVE A 18 MONTH old little girl with severe pallid bhs. She began in June this year to have seizures instead of just passing out. We are currently being medicated with seizure meds. I was just curious about other peoples experiences with their mds about this.

[KC]

I came across this site after looking for information on breath-holding spells. Our 18 month old has them and it scares my husband & I to death! I would love to talk with another mother who's child also has BHS.
[email protected]

[Jo]

Oh, I am so sorry you have to endure those episodes with your little girl. I have a friend on a message board who has a two-year old going through that right now. It sounds really tough. I have a drama KING in the making, so I will join your search for the t-shirt that fits xxxxxx-small :) He is a great little boy, my son, but he is really, really picky about certain things already - and, he screams like I have never heard a young person (baby included) wail. I hope he is a singer just waiting to be discovered :) Best of luck to you - I hope Lucie's episodes diminish!

[Betsy]

I think they need support groups for Mothers of Drama Mamas. I'd be a charter member, I fear...

[Goldberry]

My nephew had these same moments, but my sister addressed them with hugs and love every single time. As a first time mother, she thought that's what was needed. Instead, the doctor told her the same thing your doctor told you. If you give it too much attention, thse fits will continue. She pretended to completely ignore it and soon enough, he realized these fits were not working anymore.