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February 09, 2005

Comments

Jo

Oh my goodness, what a lovely post. Can't imagine my 1 year old little guy shaving yet, but I suspect it sure will feel like today was yesterday when he hits 12 and needs a razor too :) Good for you on embracing your son's growing up!

kelly

Great post, brought up a lot for me!

I used to know all of the lanky curves and angles of my little boy’s body. Lately, I hardly recognize him at all. It’s as if he’s putting a mask on every day when he wakes up, trying on a new face, fitting into a new skin. The little boy smell, that sweaty-head-in-the-sun stink that we all wish we could bottle for those midwinter days without sun, warmth, or sweat, has disappeared and the hormonal-boy-becoming-a-man ripeness that has taken its place reminds me every day that I need to keep up on the laundry.

I’m trying to recall the last time I gave him a bath, and I think it’s been about six years since I’ve seen him without most, if not all of his clothes on. Each birthday heralds in a new level of privacy and self-preservation, mixed with higher doses of embarrassment.

He turns thirteen in July, and I suspect that pretty soon he won’t think it’s weird that girls from his old school call him, and he’ll figure out that they probably don’t want to talk about what types of guns were used in World War II by the Allied Forces. His request for rides so he can have a date will become more earnest, and laden with consequence.

I’m looking at all of the little battles appearing between us, and recognizing that my putting the kaibosh on his begged request to dye his hair metallic blue might not be worth the energy if he’s going to wind up doing the generic teenage thing and finding harsher, more dangerous ways to rebel and express himself.

Like huffing.

I don’t know if I’m ready to raise a teenager. Hell, I’m still one myself most of the time, freaked out by my hair, picking at a chocolate-induced pimple, looking at my own ass in the mirror to see if anybody else can tell that my Aunt Flo’s in town.

Celeste

sniff sniff. Children are born to make us all gooey inside.

Pink Sun Drops

Oh.my.word. This brings tears to my eyes. What a beautiful way to capture each and every moment. Thank you Mel for sending me over here.

Suzanne

Thank you all for your comments!

katie

You know how important your kids are, how much you love them even when they drive you insane and you would trade them in an instant for a full night's sleep and some adult conversation.
I'm so lucky to have five healthy kids. To have nieces and nephews I love beyond reason. (Hi to my niece Beth!!) and to be able to celebrate the small, the big and the everyday.
Even to mourn what could have/should have been and to celebrate the life of one we've lost for now. We have our Chase and others, theirs.
May we all never forget to do that.

Julie

How bittersweet. I love your post.

Mel

Thank you so much for sharing this story. I, too, would like to link it on my site if you don't mind.

Emily

Your perspective and beautiful writing put a lump in my throat.

Mama Sarah

I'd just finished reading Purple Godess in Frog Pajamas (heartwrenching & beautiful; link is on the left) for the first time, and then I came here and read this. I truly appreciate the healthy dose of perspective you've given us here, although I feel completely wiped out from all this heartache and crying. I need a cookie.

trish

:sob: How touching and true, Suzanne. Thank you.

Beth

It was a very nice story. The "nephew" you are talking about was also my nephew, Chase. We will forever miss our 2 year old little guy. He was very special. I also have two young children, my son is almost 3 and my baby is turning one in 11 days. It is hard thinking I won't have ny baby anymore,but a toddler. I will charish every moment I have with my kids, because unfortunately you never know what tomorrow may bring.

cooper

I am linking this story on my blog, it is wonderful! Thank you!

Jessamyn

Count me in with the group of snifflers! Lovely, touching post.

muse

Yes, it's wonderful for them to grow up, and we must appreciate it. Some parents have trouble with it, becasue they think it makes them older. A friend told me that her parents didn't want her children to call them grandma and grandpa in the beginning. They weren't ready. How sad.

Kris

Aaaw! (wipes away tear). That's how I try to look at it too, although it's not always easy. Beautiful post!

Christine Hohlbaum

That is truly beautiful, Suzanne. To you, mom, I say "GO! GO! GO!"

Blessings,
Christine

Teresa

Very touching story Suzanne!

joy

thank you for that perspective. i needed that this morning. i just completely weaned jake over the weekend and i can't believe my 13 month old toddler isn't a baby anymore. i'm pretty weepy.

Michelle

::sniffle:: Beautiful story, Suzanne.

-Michelle

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