By Amanda
I went roller skating last weekend for the first time in probably 20 or more years. I was pleased with just how much I remembered. It's truly like riding a bike. But this time I was not in my Jordache jeans, preening for the teenaged boys. This time I was teaching my 5-year-old daughter how to feel the wind in her hair on four wheels.
She was nervous about going to a birthday party. The birthday girl was, after all, SEVEN and everyone knows that 7-year-olds know how to skate. In short, my daughter was worried that she would be the only one skating with her mother. I told her that it would be alright. That I wouldn't cramp her style or embarrass her. I made a point to tell her that cool moms skate with their kids. She was not convinced.
At first we moved tentatively along the wall. I held one shaky arm while she braced herself along the boards with the other arm. Soon I was skating backwards holding both of her hands. She held me tightly with her sweaty palms and focused squarely with her big brown eyes on her feet. She wore a blue T-shirt with "Princess" written in small crystals on the front. Her glitter bell-bottom jeans kept sagging because she insisted that she did not need a belt. In no time she was doing it on her own.
She shuffled around the rink as I skated backwards a few feet in front of her and monitored her progress. She was determined, her brow furrowed, her arms outstretched for balance. It took us about 10 minutes to do one lap. Every few minutes she would break into a wide grin and say: "Mommy look, I'm doing it! I'm really doing it!"
The whole experience was like watching her learn to walk all over again. It was a parenting moment - from the first tentative shuffles to the slow roll that gave her confidence as she made her way -- without my help, but under my watchful eye -- around the rink.
I was bursting with pride as I watched her determination to master something hard, something she was afraid of. She didn't want to stop and she wanted all of the other girls to see her skating without my help.
These moments sneak up on you -- the many firsts that you experience with children. There's no way to predict how you will feel when you see the first soccer ball kick, the first dance recital, the first fall in the roller-skating rink. Even her falls proved to me that she was a trooper -- no tears, just determination to get back up and do it again.
Even now I can close my eyes and smile when I think of her face -- somewhere between little girl and big girl, determined, fearless, and ready to take whatever comes her way. I also can't forget the experience -- my back is killing me!
This is such a beautiful post. I learned to skate when I was 8, and my dad was the one that taught me... he was not quite so... understanding as you, but it was still fun to learn.
Posted by: Square1 | March 16, 2005 at 08:57 PM