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January 23, 2006

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Dereck

I think that boys and girls are concentrated on different things nowadays. Girls are more accurate than boys and I think more mature.

Peyton

I grew up hearing about the gender-gap in education - but in the reverse. I heard that girls weren't called on as frequently in the classroom, that teachers preferred to hear from boys, that girls were less likely to go to college and graduate school. Girls have come a long way in school even since I was little. And while it appears (and I haven't read the Newsweek article) that boys are "falling behind", could it simply be that girls have caught up and passed the boys? Shouldn't we be celebrating the success of women in education, leadership roles, and professional occupations? While there may be more than can be done for boys (I have long been a proponent of single-gender education, as a graduate of a women's college myself), I don't think we should diminish the accomplishments of girls, either.

Alina Adams

Actually, this issue is exactly why my 6 year old son is enrolled in an all boy's school which stresses a verbal, literature based curriculum, with male teachers for role models. I wasn't too keen on a single sex education, but my husband, who taught at an all-boy school eventually brought me around. His observation is that, in a classroom setting, girls are easier to deal with than boys... and so that's what teachers want to do: turn little boys into little girls, and punish them when they rebel.

LauriJon

On the toddler front, I've noticed that Maricella and her girl friends are much more verbal than her boy friends even at age two. And the girls are already beginning to participate in pretend play, where the boys are more fascinated with trains, cars, and building blocks. (Although Maricella loves trains, cars and blocks too!)

Jacquelyne Cox

Regarding the Newsweek article,a common thread of these discussions is that boys tend to have more difficulty with language and communication skills, and these skills are increasingly required in the classroom and society at large. What's more, the visibility of socially disconnected boys has grown steadily over the last century because there are far fewer nonverbal, asocial lifestyle and voactional options. In this century, you son is statistically unlikely to grow up and work the land or be a lonesome cowboy!


Simply put, language is the basis of learning in school, and few vocational options remain that don't rely heavily on social perception and communication. Despite some of the pessimistic stats, there's no question that we can help boys to communicate and connect, and give them the tools they need to be strong in all areas of life. School is a child's most significant " community, " so doing well in school means more than keeping up academically - it means learning to shine as a friend, and hopefully as a leader as well.


Old ideas of leadership were very hierarchical - being a leader was destiny - which was code for living a life of privilege. Today, we can allow for a more multidimensional idea of leadership. Each of us has the capability to lead somewhere. Some boys may stand out in science class, others on the football foeld, and yet others in student government. Yes, we have a crisis in boys' development, but let's not give way to doom and gloom! There is so very much we can do - and we can begin doing it today. Our kids are our life's greatest masterpiece and they deserve all the energy and wisdom we can summon to make them great!

Please consider checking out:
Boys of Few Words: Raising Our Sons to Communicate and Connect
Adam Cox, PhD
(Guilford 2006)

www.dradamcox.com

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