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February 11, 2006

Comments

Casey Carver

Hi,

My name is Casey and I work for a interactive DVD games company in Santa Monica, CA called Snap TV. We make educational games for children and are also working with Scholastic to release Clifford and I Spy games in the fall. If you would like to check us out our website is www.snaptvgames.com I am looking to see if you would be interested in a program we are working on? I will send you our games and in return you play with your children and talk about them to your other friends or on your blog. Is this something you would be interested in? I would like to send you Animal Adventures, it teaches children about the habitats of animals all over the world. Here is my email if you would like to participate ccarver@snaptvgames.com, I look forward to hearing from you.

Best,
Casey Carver

Casey Carver

Hi,

My name is Casey and I work for a interactive DVD games company in Santa Monica, CA called Snap TV. We make educational games for children and are also working with Scholastic to release Clifford and I Spy games in the fall. If you would like to check us out our website is www.snaptvgames.com I am looking to see if you would be interested in a program we are working on? I will send you our games and in return you play with your children and talk about them to your other friends or on your blog. Is this something you would be interested in? I would like to send you Animal Adventures, it teaches children about the habitats of animals all over the world. Here is my email if you would like to participate ccarver@snaptvgames.com, I look forward to hearing from you.

Best,
Casey Carver

Jenny B.

I'm late to this post, but must agree that it is rude to hijak someone else's party for any reason. I have a child with food allergies and one so picky its embarrasing. But that is not anyone else's burden. I do not believe that other folks have to be short-order cooks for my kids. If I suspect my children won't be able to eat somewhere I either bring other food or leave early. It is inexcusable to undermine someone else's hard work so blatently -- it seems almost deliberately provacative.

What about the converse of this issue? I hosted my extended family at my son's favorite restaruant for his birthday. His cousin (12) ate before she came, then ordered a full meal and dessert. Needless to say, she took only bites of each, and was planning to leave the remainder on the table. I had the hostess pack them up for her so she would at least understand that she should eat her food sometime and not waste it. Her mother thought I was crazy and had no difficulty with her daughter ordering food she wasn't going to eat -- especially if someone else was paying.

How would you handle this one?

Mamacita

I guess I am the meanest mommy at this table, because no matter where we were, at home or elsewhere, the menu consisted of "Take it or leave it." And if the kid is hungry enough, he/she will find something to eat at any kind of buffet, without the parent ruling it inadequate and ordering out, especially at someone else's house: someone who had prepared food. How rude.

Angela Giles Klocke

I guess my thought would be, I wasn't there and do not know if something was or was not arranged. I won't spend energy thinking about whether it was rude or not because that would mean I am assuming to know what really happened -- and I don't.

I totally see your point, and living in the land of rude people, I get your feelings in this. I just hate to take a side and say what a behavior was if I wasn't there and don't know what REALLY happened.

Betsy

What I keep coming back to here is this: what kind of expectations are we setting up for our kids when we cater to their needs 24/7?

I know, I know - it's just pizza, it's just one party, it's one symptom of a disease that may or may not be there. I'm probably blowing it all out of proportion (and I devoutly hope I'm lingering on this longer than the hostess herself did!)

And I wish I could just brush it off - but I fear it's just one symptom of a much bigger disease; a sign of an impending epidemic of even more rudeness.

See, I know of families where their children have been trained to assume that the world will, indeed, revolve around them - and object vociferously if it doesn't. And these kids (and families) seem to be setting the standard on a bunch of different levels. Ever have one or two kids in a group pull the entire class over the cliff? Or one or two parents sidetrack a discussion about curriculum 'cause it doesn't meet their needs?

Or - on a more mundane note - have childless people turn up their noses at the thought of your ill-mannered brats showing up at their house or in their restaurant or business, because they've only seen ill-mannered brats?

That kind of behavior (and those assumptions) had to start somewhere, didn't it?

M&Co.

I think I fall into the "rude" camp. It strikes me as as being the same as being invited to dinner and ordering chinese delivered because you don't like the fare.

Angela Giles Klocke

I guess I'm too laid back. I personally wouldn't care and wouldn't spend so much energy on it. There are bigger things to worry about in life :)

Pink

I'm with the general consensus here--if the hostess had been consulted, that would have been fine, but otherwise it is rude. Bring your own, take potluck, or leave early--ordering in to someone else's house with no permission is pretty ballsy.

I generally make sure that I've got things for kids in my house, but I was guilty at Thanksgiving of having no peanut butter in the house with a very picky four year old--my one year old wasn't eating it yet. If it hadn't been a holiday, I probably would have run out and gotten some, but now I know to always have it on hand.

Nicole

As the hostess I wouldn't be bothered in the least if someone ordered pizza for their kids, especially if I hadn't made any particular effort to cook for the kids present. As a mom, it would never occur to me to order a pizza to be delivered to someone else's house. I would probably just pack ahead and then make do with what was available on the buffet. But if there was some sort of special circumstance that meant the child had to eat while we were at this person's house and there was nothing available for children, I would much rather order something than ask her to make something for us.

brenne

I have to agree with the rude crowd. I think the parents of the hungry children should have brought them home to feed them if there was nothing acceptable at the party. Hostesses do their best, but aren't perfect.

Jessica

Rude, all the way.
1) Teach you child to taste a little of everything. If there really is nothing for them to eat, they can wait a little and have something after.
2) It's just plain rude to delve into someone's cupboards for something more to your taste or to order something in. It's never too early to teach your kids manners by example.
3) When you are in someone's home you should go out of your way to make them feel as though everything they did was perfect. Anyone who has ever thrown a party feels insecure about at least part of what they have done, no guest should do something to reinforce that feeling.

Cricket

I think the hostess could find it rather insulting that her food didn't pass muster, but passing muster with a socially-blind kid doesn't matter so much to the kid.

At the same time, the hostess could be complimented that folks wanted to stay on at the party and would do what it took to stay with kids in tow.

If I'd had my kid there, what would have bothered me would have been that a select number of kids would have pizza and mine wouldn't have, that I would appear a bad parent in his eyes by denying my kid something he'd prefer to eat. I wouldn't want or need that friction. Perhaps if the parents got together with the hostess' blessing on the pizza, I could understand. Otherwise, I primarily don't agree with kids being left out of a party within a party.

That last part is the hardest to me. Fellow party-goer kids were being excluded and those parents would have to tap dance around it for their kid's sake.

But I am surprised at there not being kid-friendly food at a supposedly kid-friendly gathering.

I guess I fall on the 'rude' side, but for different reasons than you.

Jenn C.

I think also that it depends, but I come down on the side of it was rude. If the family had spoken with the hostess and gotten her blessing, and were close enough that it was actually appropriate to ask in the first place, then I'd let it slide.

Otherwise, yeah, if you know your kids are picky eaters either plan ahead or bring your own snacks for the kids. Serving alternate food to your kids in such a public way as having pizza delivered to the party is over the top rude, and potentially hugely embarassing to the hostess.

I'm lucky that my daughter will each lots of different food, so I've rarely been in a position where I couldn't find something she would eat, but if I did, I'd almost certainly rather leave a party early than order pizza for her.

amy h.

Like most things, I think my answer would be, "it depends." I've been to work-related parties where my kids were the only kids, and I wouldn't have thought to order pizza to the host's home. I've also been at parties at friend's homes where I have suggested getting something separate for the kids so that they will "last longer." However, most of the parties we attend are primarily "kid parties" where this isn't an issue. So I think it depends on your comfort with the people involved. Interesting...I'll be interested in other's responses.

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