DotMoms

Beauty sleep math

By Helene

The 5:30 alarm comes much too early for me, and on most mornings as I lather my head in the shower and try to wake up my overly tired body with a steamy shower, I'm reminded that, as a mother, this is part of my destiny.   

If I begin to do the actual math then it,s easy to see why men actually do age more gracefully than women -- it's all ZZZZs.

Take myself for example. A working woman, mom to two active kids and wife to a husband who gets at least a half-hour of sleep more than me each day. (Note: This estimate is kind; it doesn't factor in weekends)

Given this information and the age of my oldest child, I can easily calculate that my hubby has already logged 913 more hours of siesta time than me! No wonder my gray hairs and wrinkle lines are accumulating faster than his. If I equate this to a full night's sleep, than in the last five years he's gained more than 114 nights of consecutive ZZZZs!   

When I extend this calculation over the next 15 years –- crossing my fingers as I do that my children actually leave home when they enter college -- the figure completely blows me away. By 2020, my husband will have gained more than … 3,650 hours … or … 456 8-hour nights … or … 1.25 years of sleep than me!!! 

This just doesn't seem fair. He doesn't need beauty sleep -- I do!

I guess I should be bitter about this all, but in reality I'm not. Oh, don't get me wrong, I do have my cursing moments at 5:30 a.m. when I strongly resent the snoring that I hear coming from his side of the bed. But after a warm steamy shower and a hot cup of coffee I remind myself that if the averages are true in the men vs. women life expectancy stats, I should have 5.4 years more than David to make up for it. J   

How does your math compute?

Fashion faux pas

By Helene

Kathryn threw a fit earlier this week when I pull out her heavy winter coat. "I don't want to wear the puffy coat!" she hollered and cried for nearly the entire ride into town. "The other kids won't wear big coats."

I guess I should consider myself lucky that we made it past 5 years old before the little fashion police grew in her head. But now that they've revealed themselves, I'm hoping I can snuff them out before they grow too big. Oh, I knew it was inevitable that she would begin to take a keen interest in what she wears. But I never thought that the Hello Kitty coat she LOVED (and which was the envy of the other little girls in her pre-school class last year) would be the fashion faux pas of this year.   

Of course I made her wear the coat -- it was 28 degrees that morning, need I say more? -- but we had another incident in front of the school as she tried to leave her jacket in the car.   

This is just the first in a long-line of many battles to come, so I guess I should be grateful for now that the argument is over the wearing of a coat and not a halter top. But I fear those days are not too far behind.

At what age did your child develop a fashion sense?

The rules of parenting

By Helene

Someone found my site last week by doing a Yahoo search for the "rules of parenting." And although I'm somewhat flattered that my blog was actually grouped in the top 20 results for the query, I'm also mystified.

I, myself, would greatly appreciate having a quick, easy set of rules at my disposal to help in raising my daughters. But alas, if I have learned one thing by becoming a parent, it is that there are no definitive or easy clear-cut rules to follow when it comes to being a parent. Each person must discover what works well for them and their child(ren) on their own.

If really pressed for an answer, it wouldn't take too much to think up a few rules (with the required good sense of humor). So, with this in mind, I'll leave you with just one little parenting rule I learned the hard way.

Never give your child apple juice on an airplane. Not only does it sweeten their digestive system, it creates a very stinky "apple butter" mess that nobody wants to share.

Perhaps the next time someone for "rules of parenting," there will actually be something useful to share, especially if you add your parenting bits of wisdom or rules.

The 13-minute edge

By Helene

The clock in the front hallway runs 13 minutes fast -- just enough time to keep us on schedule and long enough to give us a little breathing room if we lag behind.

Occasionally in the past I've contemplated adjusting the clock to match all the other clocks in the house (which are set correctly), but I've never acted upon the impulse. With its strategic location that dominates your vision as you descend the stairs, it's become our family's invaluable friend in ensuring that we make it out the door on time.

I'm sure most parents of young children can relate. For no matter how we try, it never seems to fail. What starts out as a 30-second shoe-tying ritual turns into a 3-minute tug-o'-war over sparkly sandals (even with the presence of 3 inches of snow outside); what begins as an easy trip to the closet to grab a cool weather jacket turns into a 5-minute whining-fest over matching colors; and what begins as a simple quick breakfast cereal routine turns into a 15-minute mess requiring not only a kitchen cleanup but a complete outfit change.

Yes, getting out the door on time these days is not as easy as it was when the girls were infants and only required bundling. Now that they have mobility, personality and attitude, the logistics of pulling together the morning ritual often takes finesse, discipline and sometimes even bribery.

Now that Kathryn's in kindergarten with a 7:50 a.m. first bell, our 13-minute cushion has become more valuable than ever and, if anything (now that her younger sister Jessica is entering the 3-year-old stubborn stage), I'm contemplating adjusting the clock again. But this time I think I'll act on my impulse and bump it up just a bit to 15 minutes. :)

"Chiney Faye"

By Helene

The best advice that anyone ever gave me when I was pregnant was to take advantage of all the evenings and dinners out that we could before the baby came along. Unfortunately at the time, we were trying to watch expenses so that we could afford to move into a bigger house, so instead of taking full advantage of our last bit of freedom we cut back to one night a week out.

Fast forward five years ... and we're lucky if we average one dinner out a month -- and when we do, it involves bringing the girls along.

We learned early in our experience as parents that outside of eating establishments that catered strictly to a chicken-nugget-and-Happy-Meal crowd, we needed to stick to restaurants that catered to kids.

Out are fining dining establishments with fancy a la carte menus. Out are casual dinners at popular places that require a 20-minute wait and vibrating pager (even though a bookstore was right next door). Out are the friendly neighborhood establishments that let you cozy up and order from the bar. Out is just about any place with a menu that includes the category "Appetizers." It's suffice to say if there is any ordering and waiting involved in getting the food to the table, then the option was OUT!

Which leave us with what as an option? Well, as Jessie would say... "Let's go to Chiney Faye!"

All I can say is bless the Lotus Garden for not only catering to kids with mac-n-cheese, ice cream and balloons, but for also serving up a decent buffet and a great sushi bar too! Oh, and let's not forget the Kiren & Sapporo. :)

How often do go out for dinner with or without the kids?

Lunch box memories

By Helene

There's an interesting exhibit at our library right now on the history of lunch boxes, and with Kathryn's entry into kindergarten this year, it brings back a lot of memories.

Do you remember your very first lunchbox? I do. Mine was a metal H.R. Pufnstuf one with Jimmy, Puff and Freddy the Flute on one side and Witchiepoo on the other.

As a kid just entering first grade, I loved this show, and, like most of my young peers, I was totally oblivious to the show's '70s psychedelic references. As fondly as I wish that I still had this lunch box today, I'm reminded that in just a few short weeks, my soon-to-be 5-year-old Kathryn will be getting her first exposure to toting a lunch to school each day.

Lunch boxes, sadly, are no longer metal these days, and in most cases they aren't even boxes anymore, they're more like bags. But does it really matter? No, not really ... for I bet that in the next few years, Kathryn (even though she won't be carrying H.R. Pufnstuf to school every day) will still somehow have many of the same lunch box bag experiences I had growing up -- such as swapping my PB & J with Mary Newman for her mint jelly sandwich or making googly eyes across the table at Paul Chicrus. (BTW: he had a Peanuts lunchbox :) )

As I think about it in the greater scheme things, perhaps the decline of metal lunch boxes for soft padded vinyl is a good thing after all -- for it eliminates the need as a parent to have to worry about Katie coming home with the class bully's Johnny Lightning lunchbox impression on her head.

Do you remember your first lunch box?

Pouncing on the Pyramid

By Helene

It's lunchtime and as usual I'm sitting here eating at my desk. Looking at the contents of my bring-from-home lunch, it has dawned on me the stark contrast between the healthy entree I'm eating (leftover chicken & shrimp spinach florentine – yum!) and its non-healthy compliment (Crunch Toons Bugs Bunny potato snacks).

Becoming parents has not only changed the way we eat dinner in our house -- nix the TV and adult-type conversation, now it's grace and family-friendly discussions about manners and the good things about the day -- but it has also changed the composition of what is served.

It's not that David and I didn't eat healthily before the girls came along, but our diet on the nutritional scale was indeed a little lopsided towards the dairy and meat food groups we enjoyed most. At nine months of age, when Kathryn started on finger foods for the first time, I became keenly aware of not only the food choices I was making for her, but those I was also making for myself. Out went the frequent lunch visits to McD's and the weekly order-in pizzas from Domino's and in came more fruits and vegetables. I was determined to establish healthy eating habits (and less costly ones too) for both Katie and ourselves.

Early on in my learning process, I gleaned two things about my daughter's taste preferences when it came to food. Number 1: unless the vegetable was corn, she wouldn't eat it. And number 2: cheese does wonders in making anything green look and taste appetizing.

Since this discovery, I've scoured magazines, family members' recipe boxes and even the Web for flavorful combinations that cleverly incorporate vegetables into their "so-yummy-I can't-taste-it" taste. At first it was a challenge, but now that I have nice set of recipe staples, we are all eating much better and reaping the benefits of a better diet.

So this brings me to the Crunch Toons bag that is sitting on my desk. With all the forward advances I've made in creating a more balanced diet for my family since Kathryn was born, I have also learned this – gimmick foods are big winners with children and sometimes you have to bend a little to keep the food pyramid in line. If a reward of Looney Tunes character snacks helps your little one eat all their zucchini and squash or adding a few chocolate sprinkles on their peaches makes them ask for seconds, then pouncing on the food pyramid a little is worth it, as long as the nutritional foundation is strong.

What changes have you made in your diet (if any) for your children?

Familiar sounds

By Helene

The plane ride back from Arkansas' Northwest Regional Airport didn't offer much in the way of distractions for a two and a half year old. However when a somewhat familiar sound came from the passenger seat in front of us, it caused a bit of a distraction and pondering for me.

"Momma, what's that?" Jessie asked, referring to the little musical tune that played a few times.

"It's a song," I told her, thinking it best to describe the funny ring as simply as possible.

"No!" she quickly corrected me, "It's a cell phone!"

Wow, I thought to myself, the pingy sound of a cell phone ringtone really is commonplace, even if it is a tune that you've never heard before, so much so that even a two and a half year old instantly knows what it is.

Anyway, while I was sitting there on the plane pondering this thought, it got me thinking about the familiar everyday sounds that have all but disappeared from our culture today -- sounds that only a generation or two ago would have been instantly recognized by a two-year-old or child of my generation, but not today.

• Rotary phone dial
• Tea pot whistle
• Typewriter

I have feeling that if Jessie ever heard these familiar sounds of my youth, they'd definitely give her pause, and even after my explanation, she'd still be a little confused.

P.S.: Just for sake of experiment, I just played these three sounds for my other daughter Kathryn (4.5 years), who walked in while I was finalizing this post. Want to know what her answers were? A car, a horse and a hammer (in the above order). Point proven!

What familiar sounds from your youth do you think your children would be clueless about? Or better yet, try the experiment yourself, and post your results. :)

Read it again, Mom -- Pleaseeeeee!

By Helene

For the past four weeks, it’s been the same night and night.

“Katie. Jess. Time to get out of the tub and pick your story.”

Katie’s quickly learned to take her time both in getting out of the bath and in making her selection so that I can begin reading Jessie’s pick from the big Disney book –- for it’s always the same.

These days it seems that very moment that I remove Jess from the tub, she make a bee ant line for her room to locate the book’s sea-foam-green cover. It may take a few minutes of page turning to thumb through the book’s 156 pages –- which often gives me enough time to get Katie out of the tub as well –- but eventually she comes dashing out the door, still naked, and proudly announcing her find.

“Momma, I found it, I found it! Bug’s Life.”

Ahh yes, we’re up to about book No. 9 in a short list of titles that have been repeatedly requested nightly for more than 50 days in a row. I don’t mind reading books again … and again … and again, for I know it’s all an important part of learning process. However, I will admit, A Bug’s Life (the Disney-ized story version) is wearing pretty thin by now. If only we could go back to those short board-book days … Oh, how I’d easily trade this current favorite for 13 readings (even in row!) of The Very Busy Spider or Goodnight Moon any day. :)

How about you? What bedtime story did/does your child continually ask for?

Peanut, Pumpkin & other pet names

By Helene

Friday night I attended a double shower for two co-workers who are both having babies in July (and both boys). During the gift openings, I posed a little question to both of them that I was sure would generate some type of response. But to my surprise, they didn’t have an answer. In fact, they both said that they had never thought about before.

Since then I've been wondering: Were David and I the norm as expectant parents or the exception? Here's what I'm talking about…

From the moment David and I found out we were pregnant, our girls had pet names long before they had their given names. We called Kathryn "Peanut" for her minuscule size in the womb and Jessica "Pumpkin" for her October due date. Even today these names have stuck and have occasionally been expanded to my "little Pumpkin Pie" or "Peanut Butter & Jelly" (the Jelly addition is actually Katie's idea) for endearment's sake.

I thought we were pretty normal in calling our unborn child by a pet name, but when I asked Tami, Jeanenne and their hubbies the question, blank looks appeared on all their faces. After nearly seven months of being pregnant, neither couple had come up with a pet name for their child.

So here's my question: Did you (and/or your spouse) have a pet name for your unborn baby? If so, do you still call your child by it today?