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December 02, 2004



Hi! I ran across your blog and I love it!

I am 20 and I moved 5 times before I was 15. I had a really hard time with all but one of the moves, but my brother adjusted to all of them really quickly, so I really sympathize with your situation.

Maybe just letting your son know that you're there to listen to all of his problems will help the best. Emphasize getting to explore a new place and all the "cool" things about moving. I know that's kind of vague, but maybe if you turn it into an adventure for him he'll respond to it better.

Hope things go more smoothly for you!


Moving is so traumatic! He seems extremely sensitive and bright which makes life more difficult sometimes. I wish I had some advice. Perhaps his new classmates won't laugh at his writing...shame on his old peers!


I was kind of relieved to get to the part where you mentioned it's actually a short distance move this time. If indeed you anticipate that you will be in this house for a long time, stress that to him. Remind him that the apartment was temporary and point out the advantages of a house.

For what it's worth, try to look at the long term. We moved to Kentucky when our son was 5. He spent at least 3 years telling us that he preferred New Jersey, meanwhile making new friends and settling in quite nicely. He's now 19, in college in a different state, and can't wait to be back in Kentucky full time!

Tammy and the Rats

Maybe the first thing you could do in the new house is set up your holiday decorations. I don't know if you set up a tree or not, but what ever your "traditional" decorations are will give him a feeling of the holidays through the move. As much of an inconvenience it is for you, it might make him feel better. Best of luck!


Boy, I wish I could help you there. I have strongly discouraged any talk of moving when it comes up in work related discussions. Because Tony is an only child, his friends are very, very important to him, and I want him to feel secure in one place.

As for Colter, have you sat down with him and listened to his feelings? Does he realize that he will be going to the same school, have the same friends, and will generally be in the same area?

You're a writer, have you shared with your son some of what you had written? Perhaps you and he can go over it together so he can hear the flow, rhythm and structure of your words.


Having moved twice in the last two years myself(6 months apart)I hope I can give you something worthwhile.
We included the girls, when we could, in the moving process. You could let Colter decide how to arrange his new bedroom, maybe let him know that he can still invite his friends over to play. Let him know that things don't really change that much.
Has he seen the house yet?


That is so tough. I thought it was hard with a 3 year old, but she does amazingly well. And I am fortunate she can stay with her dad or my parents while I put everything together (unpacking the ENTIRE house in one day...NOT fun) before she comes to her new home.

Hugs, understanding, talking. Same for us I guess. **hugs** to you :-)


We had to move 5 years ago--my oldest was 11 at the time--she had a very hard time--we moved about 50 miles from where we had been living--we just had to ride out the meltdowns she went through--but she came around in a while --of course now she tells us if we move now--we move with out her :)

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